The Wonderful World of Wanzie: A Questionable Year

By : Michael Wanzie
Comments: 0

Since this is to be my final column of 2017, I’ve decided to look back over the year in the form of questions. I’ll begin back at the top of year: January 20, 2017—a day that will live in infamy.

So this guy, with his hand on the Bible, freely admitted that he routinely kissed women uninvited and pressed toward them in inappropriate ways. He boasted that when one is a star, as is he, he can get away with doing anything he wants to woman. He proclaimed that he grabs women by the pussy. In response to his admission of serial sexual assaults on women, Billy Bush stupidly laughed. How is it Billy Bush lost his job but that guy becomes president of the United States of America?

Was putting an oil mogul in charge of the Environmental Protection Agency really the best way to ensure we protect our environment?

Was putting a woman who has never attended a public school, never sat on a local school board and who favors waivers for private schools in charge of our system of public education really the best way to ensure the children of the average wage earner receive a quality education?

Was putting an avid hunter, who has publicly stated he does not believe the Department of the Interior needs to exist, in charge of the Department of the Interior really the best way to ensure our treasured national parks are properly funded and protected?

Was putting a man who has openly stated he does not believe the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau should exist in charge of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau really the best way to safeguard Americans from once again losing their life savings, their pensions and even their homes?

Was introducing a tax reform bill that gifts tax breaks to the richest among us, gifts tax breaks to corporations, raises the taxes of the average American wage earner and adds to the federal deficit in the process the best way to lift up the middle class as promised?

Was throwing rolls of paper towels at people whose homes were destroyed and disparaging innocent victims for not doing enough to help themselves really the best way to show compassion for hurricane survivors?

Was calling a war widow a liar on the very day she was to claim the remains of her dead husband really the best way for the commander in chief to honor the family of a fallen soldier?

Was encouraging people to vote into the U.S. Senate a judge who has twice been removed from the bench for refusing to follow the law of the land, and who further has been credibly accused of child molestation, really a good way to set a moral tone for the body politic?

Was routinely and publicly ridiculing the FBI—and doing everything in one’s power to cause the general public to doubt the integrity and safeguard-driven mission of our intelligence community—really the best way for our Moron in Chief to help the nation feel secure?

Was picking fights with and publicly ridiculing the prime minister of Great Britain really the best way to maintain and strengthen our diplomatic relations with our greatest ally?

Was lying on a daily basis about matters big and small really the best way to gain or maintain respect for the office of the presidency?

Was maliciously, relentlessly, and falsely claiming that respected and credible long-standing news agencies were purposely manufacturing and dispensing “Fake News” really the best way to safeguard our cherished, integral free press and the 4th Amendment of the Constitution?

Was publicly name-calling, bullying, and egging-on an unstable dictator really the best way to squash growing animosity and threats toward our country from an irrational and reactionary leader of an enemy country with nuclear capabilities?

Was erroneously suggesting that the host of an MNSBC current events show should be investigated for murder really the best way to demonstrate to America and the world that our Pussy Grabber in Chief has his eye on the ball and is focused on what is truly important?

Was voting for the most ill-mannered, ill-tempered, emotionally unstable, childlike man to ever ascend to the presidency really a good thing to have done?

Voting for a man who knows not how the government operates and seemingly cares not to learn; a man who knows nothing of history and has no interest in reading about it or learning from it; a man who seemingly has no learning curve whatsoever when it comes to governing; a man who trusts the leader of Russia more than he trusts his own American intelligence agencies; a man who surrounded himself with know-nothing anti-globalism pro-conspiracy theory racists as his top advisors; a man who lacks even the most basic understanding of the Constitution of the United States of America and the all-important separation of powers; and an administration which is obscenely connected to and concerned with Russian interests?

Isn’t it time to call your representatives and insist they impeach?

Or, we can sit back complacently and say nothing as our country is literally destroyed and hope against hope that this man-child maniac doesn’t tweet us into World War III.

Merry Christmas! Oh yeah, thank you Trump for bringing that back. What a tremendous stride toward making America great again. FUCK YOU.

Not My President!—And a Happy New Year!

Michael Wanzie is a playwright and theatrical producer residing in Orlando. You may subscribe to his weekly WANZeGRAM performing arts & cultural e-newsletter by logging onto

Share this story: