Lounging Lesbians and a Celebrity Quickie

“Trust me, it is really him,” I say to [Watermark's Online Editor] Jamie as we belly up to the bar at the Eola-adjacent Stardust Lounge.

“I don’t think it is,” she replies. “How can you be so sure?”

“Oh, I don’t know…let’s call [Watermark Publisher] Tom Dyer and ask him whose blog he wanted to title Celebrity Whore,” I shoot back. “Oh wait, that was me.”

We are stealing glances over my shoulder at the former boy bander in question, the one and only Joey Fatone, who is sitting at a table having a most animated conversation with Blue, the host of Dirty Bingo and all-around good girl, even when she’s being bad. She has his undivided attention and she doesn’t even need nipple tape to do it. That’s our girl!

If it were ten years ago he might be asking her to dance in or choreograph a music video for NSYNC. But it isn’t and he ain’t. Ten years ago you couldn’t throw a rock in this town without hitting a boy band member or the fat man who wanted to fondle them. They were everywhere, entourages in tow, and there was always talk, true or not, about who was where with whom and doing what.

Ah, the good old days! Fatone looks a lot more peaceful now, less rattled perhaps, as he sits and chats with Blue, who mere moments ago was waving dildos and dirty DVDs at her late night bingo crowd. Fairvilla is the official sponsor of this weekly twist on the game that you used to only find in the rec hall at the Catholic Church and she has the prizes to prove it. Sigh.

We were all just a little bit more wholesome back then, right? Before the new millennium smacked our collective asses with it’s bare hand. Before Big Poppa ruined everything for everyone.

“I’m just going to have to prove it to you then,” I say as I steer Jamie up and away from the Watermark table and towards Lance Bass’ BFF. “And then you will never ever doubt me again, right?”

We walk over and stand right next to where he is sitting, something that we could never have done back in the day without being clobbered by massive bodyguards.

“Blue, we want to ask your handsome friend a question,” I blurt out.
 
“Sure baby, go right ahead,” she says with a smile.

In his mind he is thinking ‘ok, here it comes’ expecting us to ask if he is Joey from NSYNC or can we have an autograph or a picture or why doesn’t he call Justin Timberlake on his cell phone right now so that we can all say hi. But then I throw him a curve and take him back in time and backstage at a Cher concert somewhere midway through her first final farewell tour.

“Do you remember the night you first met Cyndi Lauper?” I bop while I name drop.

“In LA?” he asks. “No wait, it was at a Cher concert.”

“That’s right,” I give him the prize. “And it was here in Orlando and you had just revealed your dyed orange hair.”

And so for a few minutes we banter back and forth about Cyndi and how excited he seemed to be when he got to meet her. He tells me about how last year after the Grammy’s he got her to come to an after party where one of his favorite 80’s cover bands was playing and how they pulled her up on stage for a song and he caught it all on his video phone.

Even in the dimly lit bar his face lights up when he talks about her. Kind of like the face of a young schoolgirl when she meets her favorite boy band. He is also very engaging and looks you right in the eye when he is talking to you. Very personable.

But we don’t want to come off as stalky. I know that if I stand there for another minute I am just going to flat out ask him if he and Lance will agree to MC a fund raiser to help raise the funds we need to buy a building for OYA’s queer youth center. But those are questions best asked without hard cider on my breath.

“Next time,” I promise myself and every GLBT teen in Central Florida.

We thank Joey for his time and excuse ourselves with a handshake for him and a wink for Blue. Jamie, [my husband] Greg and I make our way back to Watermark's table and I am feeling slightly triumphant at being right.

“You’ll get used to it,” I tell Jamie. “It’s like Gaydar only I get a feeling when there is a celebrity within a few blocks of me. Just one of those gifts that we can’t explain.”

Jamie smiles and rolls her eyes. And to think it was her simple yet inviting text message that got me off the couch, away from Melrose Place and downtown to enjoy the company of great friends, good talent and a former NSYNC member with a killer smile and a sense of his place in this world.

Outside on the sidewalk we catch up with Blue who I don’t think we have seen since Fringe back in May.

“Really? Has it been that long,” she ponders.

“Too long,” suggests Greg.

We pose for a few pictures paparazzi style and share ideas for the next Fringe Festival. Half a million hugs later and Greg and I are strolling hand in hand down Central Avenue under the empowering waving of Rainbow flags as far as the eye can see.

Our True Colors are shining through but it’s time to say Bye, bye, bye.

See full gallery of photos from our night at Dirty Bingo.