8.6.09 Editor’s Desk

8.6.09 Editor’s Desk

SteveBlanchardHeadshotI’m not a suitable parent.

Never mind that I have no criminal record, once ran a group home for developmentally disabled adults, have worked as a substitute teacher and kids seem to love me. But in the State of Florida, I’m considered an inappropriate selection as a parent because I’m gay. So, I found it very interesting that Gov. Charlie Crist was so excited about Explore Adoption Day in Florida last month.

On July 22, our governor put the focus on adoption, which I think is one of the state’s most important issues. He urged Floridians to look into adopting the thousands of children in the State’s system who are in need of caring, loving homes.

I couldn’t agree more with the importance of helping our kids. Kids need a permanent home—a home with loving parents who can provide for them and offer them resources otherwise outside of their grasp.

But, as most of our readers know, Florida is the only state in the country with a sweeping ban against gays and lesbians adopting children. The 1977 legislation actually reads: “No person eligible to adopt under this statute may adopt if that person is a homosexual.”

What amazes me is the number of my straight friends and acquaintances who don’t know that gays and lesbians are banned from adopting here. It’s also frustrating that so many gays and lesbians shrug off the law as “old news” and say they don’t want to be parents anyway.

A discriminatory law is a discriminatory law, whether it directly affects you or not.

Ever since I was a child, I imagined having kids of my own. But I’ve never pursued adoption of any kind. Knowing that I wouldn’t get past the first piece of paperwork without lying about my sexual orientation has definitely been a deterrent. Why would I want to start a relationship with my new son or daughter knowing that I had to lie to acquire the right to be his or her parent? Added to that, how would I explain to my child that his or her grandparents disapprove of their fathers’ family?

At the same time, more than 4,000 children in Florida live in foster care, dreaming of the day they can have a permanent home. Of course, gays and lesbians are free to act as foster parents in the state—but we cannot adopt the children we help through a tough transitional time.

It’s just not fair—to LGBTs and to the lonely un-adopted children throughout the state. Imagine if every gay person who wanted to adopt a child in Florida could do just that. The number of children under the care of the Department of Children and Families would be drastically reduced, meaning fewer kids would wind up on the evening news as “forgotten” DCF cases. Every time I see one of those stories I cringe, thinking of all the suitable gay and lesbian households in which that child could have been placed.

Fortunately, there are some politicians in Florida who are for repealing the ridiculous gay adoption ban. Among them is Sen. Nan Rich of Weston, who took Crist to task for his Explore Adoption Day proclamation. She applauded his effort to promote the importance of adoption, but rightfully attacked the ban and his support of it.

Rich has been constantly at our side since she took office. But we have to ask ourselves if that’s enough.

I don’t think it is. We have to be more vocal.

Upon learning about Crist’s proclamation, I emailed him through the state’s Web site. I explained to him that I wanted to adopt a child and provide him or her a safe, comfortable life. I’ll probably never know if he saw the letter, but I do know it was received, based on the automated response that landed in my inbox a few hours later.

I can only hope that the collective voice of equality-minded Floridians is heard, and that soon we can all truly explore what it means to be adoptive parents.
To ask Crist to support repealing the gay adoption ban, visit FLGov.com/Contact_Form.

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